Bobby's Conscience


"It’s Okay, I’m Okay"

I’ve been letting the grass grow under my feet
Been hanging from phone wires and watching my hands bleed
Its funny how the world can make you feel
So naive when you bank on it

I read your email eight times today
One for every stop I passed through on the train
Sometimes I wonder if you’re to blame
But I figure you were perfect

I’m doing my best to clear my head
Unconventionally trying to wipe out and forget
Still I think of you when I lay in bed
The one place I keep guarded

I hope that you can mend a heart on your own
Because you know I had to do it all alone
Everyone’s been blinding themselves back home
And I’m just blindly optimistic

I remember when you told me you’ve had enough
I said I’d carry all the love for the both of us
You accused my words of rolling fresh off my tongue
So you checked it out yourself

Now your record players spinning; its toxic, I think.
I’ve been breathing in its cancer while my room caves in on me
But I grew to love the walls and the toxins they bring
Cause they let me see you clearer

Drinking out an advil bottle like you used to do
Prescriptions, medications, and  vacations ensued
I kept it quiet but so did you
Now no one knows about us

The house grew quieter as our voices did
You left me then with all I already took for granted
Now all I hear are your words in my head
They echo and I cant stop them

By the time you find this letter ill be long gone
Gone from your reach, gone from all that just went wrong
I do hope that this letter finds you well
But if it doesn’t, I’ll be fine as far as I can tell

Cuz I’ve been doing this on impulse for months gone by
This letter’s just one of the few, few thousand I’ve tried to write
But should you read it and wish to reply
Send a letter from your heart, ill read it in my mind
For all I know I could still survive
For all I know we could give it a try
For all the people I’ve left behind
For all I know you were all a lie.
For all the times I’ve tried to cry,
For you my love, I’ve loved you all this time.